Hearts at Home #7- Help your husband be a Hero

My husband Jonathan is a hero. He has been my hero for quite some time even before we were married. Each one of our children sees their Daddy as a hero. One of my desires is to be a wife that continually communicates that I am Jonathan’s biggest fan. This is an area I know I need help in so that is why I choose to Help your husband be a Hero by Tim Shoemaker.

Tim was a great speaker.  The three main points I gleaned from this workshop were: As wives, we have been given an important job by God, It is important to make sex a priority, and emotional intimacy is also important.

As wives, we have been given an important job by God

In 1 Peter 3:1, we read “Wives, in the same way, submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives.” As wives, we have been given an important job by God. We are to influence our man for good. This can be done without our words because our actions speak clearly. Does our husband feel loved and desired by us? Do we respect our husband with our words and actions? Do we act interested in his work? Tim challenged us to make sure our husband feels accepted by us. Our words need to build up our husbands instead of tearing him down.

It is important to make sex a priority in marriage

Tim spoke very candidly about making sex a priority in marriage. He didn’t mince words and I am grateful for that. Tim mentioned that husbands love it when their wife initiates sex. Men want their wife to desire them. Sex is powerful because it strengthens the couple in a sexual and emotional bond. It melts away the worries and has lots of health benefits. If you are halfhearted with your sexual intimacy, you are missing the benefits. Sex is the ultimate expression of a man’s love. Basically, to sum it up, you’re not going to have a great sex life unless you make it a priority. Tim was so bold with us on this point. Jonathan needs to know that he is my most important relationship. I can show this by being to more available for my husband.

Emotional intimacy is also important

Another main point I gleaned from this workshop is that in addition to sexual intimacy, emotional intimacy is needed. We must carve out time for this! Tim gave great tips on how to do this.

1. One activity (sport) at a time – One a year with no Sunday games – We aren’t doing our kids a favor by being so exhausted from running around so much. Time at home builds relational skills.

2. Pace yourself – don’t get too exhausted – take a nap if you need it – ask for help – be alert for Husband

3. Never stop dating – listen to him and dream with him, save the news for dates, keep up with where each of you is, dates at home

4. Guard time for just the two of you – be careful of phone time, put it away when together!

5. Don’t share a bed with kids. It puts a wet blanket on intimacy.

6. Don’t go to bed ahead of each other. Go to bed together. Encourage your husband to get up earlier if he has things to do. This time together will strengthen your bond.

7. Talk nice. Don’t be sarcastic, mean or rude. Remember Proverbs 12:18. Build each other up!

Challenged and Encouraged

This workshop was very challenging for me but also very encouraging. I have a lot of growing to do. God has given me a very important role in my husband’s life. Tapping into the Holy Spirit more and influencing Jonathan for good is so key. My words need to be life-giving and build my husband up. Tim challenged us women to make time for sex. It must be a priority! I commit to growing in this area too. And finally, I will do what I can to build the emotional intimacy in our marriage. Jonathan is my hero and I want to continually communicate that to him.

How about you? Do your words build up or tear down your husband? Is sex a priority in your marriage? How is the emotional intimacy? Is your husband your hero? Does he know that? I challenge you to grow in these areas. I am with you on this journey…