Change in Your Marriage is Possible!

Marriage is a beautiful gift but it can also be difficult. Maybe you can relate? A real marriage is one where each person is being perfected.

The second workshop I attended at the Hearts at Home conference was No More Perfect Marriages. It was led by Mark and Jill Savage. I learned so much and am excited to share it with you.

Conflict

Conflict is growth trying to happen. This concept was life-changing for me. I have always seen conflict as bad. But, it is not. If you are struggling in your marriage relationship, something new is about to be born.

Positive Change

“If you’re hoping for a positive change in your marriage, remember: It starts with you!” We are the only ones who can control how we act. Instead of pointing fingers, let’s look at how we can change.

Jill shared some questions to ask when a conflict comes up. First, “Does this hurt me or irritate me?” And secondly, “Does this need to be corrected or simply accepted as part of being an imperfect person?” I am looking forward to applying these questions.

Slow Fades

Mark and Jill shared the Seven Slow Fades that can happen in marriages. The first one was the Slow Fade of Unrealistic Expectations. Too often, we have expectations of our spouse and become discontent when they don’t meet them. This can lead to disillusionment. They also addressed the Slow Fade of Disagreement. When this comes, we often posture ourselves in a place to not hear our spouse.

God-Tools

The God- Tools are what help us to turn around our marriages. The God-Tool of forgiveness is a big one. Too often it is the one most underused. Mark and Jill also talked about the God-Tool of compassion. This builds bridges and security in our marriage.

The rest of the Slow Fades and God-Tools are in Mark and Jill Savage’s book which is called No More Perfect Marriages. I encourage you to check it out.

Marriage is hard work but so worth it! It’s a process of two people being perfected. The next time you face conflict in your marriage, I encourage you to see it as an opportunity to grow. Remember that positive change starts with you. Steer clear of the Seven Slow Fades and use the Eight God-Tools in your marriage. Joining you in the journey…

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