Why One on One Time with your Kids is Important

What is your child’s favorite color? What is their greatest fear? What kind of books do they like to read?

How do we learn the answers to these questions and many others? By having individual time with your children. One on One time is important because it communicates value, builds the relationship, and helps behavior.

Communicates Value

One on One time is important because it communicates value to your kids. You are saying to your child that it’s worth spending quality time with just him or her. Your presence with your child is honestly one of the best gifts you could give them.

This presence is different than just being at home or at a ball game. In those settings, your child doesn’t have your full attention which is understandable. When you are with your child is a time you can be fully engaged and present with them.

Builds Relationship

Another reason why one on one time is important is that it builds your relationship with that individual child.

Think about it. How did you get to know your best friend? By spending time with them.

One on One time with your children also helps you to see life from their perspective. You get to know their preferences. This time gives you the opportunity to ask questions and engage with your children more.

Helps Behavior

Often children will act up when they are needing attention. Does this happen in your home? Children figure some negative attention is better than no attention.

As parents, we can answer this cry for attention by being intentional about getting one on one with our kids. Investing in our children will help negative behavior be less and less.

The How to

One on One time is a great idea and all but how do you fit it in? Every family is different so you will need to figure out what works best for the season of life you are in.

The length of time for one on one time will also vary. I suggest at least 10 minutes but more time is great too. In our family, we created a schedule for One on One time. This schedule is on the fridge. Talk about accountability. The kids love knowing when their time with Mom is. The posted schedule is also a great visual for me.

During the summer, my goal is to have time with the kids each day. During the school year, I will list two different days for each kid. Of course, I would love to do more. But the reality is, things come up. Someone needs help with homework, schedule changes, etc. That is why I tried to be proactive and schedule two days so if the time is available I will use it.

One on One time is important because it communicates value, builds the relationship, and helps behavior. How can you work this into your family life? Below are some ideas for one on one time with your kids. Please comment with other ideas you have tried. I’m always looking for new ideas. Have fun connecting with your kids!

 One on One Time Ideas:

• Run errands with one child
• Take a walk around the block
• Have one child help you with dinner
• Take out for a special treat
• Play their favorite board game